I need to go shopping and stop at the DMV and go visit Tiff's mom...
Busy little person today.
Not to mention I've supposedly been banned from staying home. I told my mother that I was no longer babysitting Kylee for her so she has Stacey ((my sister)) doing it tonight, but according to Stacey she will leave if I come home.
Gah.
The bitch is stupid and doesn't take any sort of responsibility. Hell, she told mom that she would babysit if my mom needed her to. She said that it would be fine... now that mom has asked her to, she's complaining.
What a fucktard.
Aw well. There is no way I'm staying gone till 11 tonight, though. No way in hell. She can bite me.
AND I'm not going to babysit either...so she had better not leave. Or I'll shoot her. Ha.
Yes, I realize I sound like a child and you are all probably asking yourself: "Why don't you just babysit, you asshole?"
And the reason is this: I have told my mother numerous, numerous times that I would stop babysit if shit didn't change. I'm tired of everyone else in the house coming home and telling Kylee she can do things that I've told her not to. That's crap. Kylee doesn't listen to a damn thing anyone says and I've asked my mom and my sisters to please try harder at not contradicting each other in front of Kylee. I told them that if we dislike something one of us has said, then we should take that person aside later and talk to them about it. But no. No one seems to think this is a good idea. And I'm tired of talking and saying I'm going to do something and not following through. How is my mom ever going to realize that I'm serious if she doesn't have to face any consequences?
It's all the principle of the matter really. I've tried to be an adult in this situation and I've tried my hardest to not create any problems... but I'm done trying. I'm through. No more.
Anyhow. To end my little rant...
I went to the library yesterday. I seen all my old co-workers. They all seemed pretty happy to see me... at least I'm assuming that the smiles on their faces were from happiness and not something else. I found out that Heidi is pregnent, which is like super wonderful for her seeing as she has been trying to get pregnant ever since she had her first, which was, like, 6 years ago. Jamie complimented my crazy hair. ((She said it looks, well, normal now. I'm guessing she didn't see that some of it is like this weird greenish gray color, but whatever.)) I thought going in there would be a little uncomfortable. But it wasn't. Not really. It was nice to see the people I used to work with everyday. Yeah.
But, and I really hate admitting to this... I felt this massive amount of jealousy overwhelm me when Heidi told me she was pregnant. I did well in hiding it, but I did feel jealous. And it sucks. It's all crazy because I never freaking wanted kids. All growing up, up until a few months after I met Alfred, I did not want kids. They seemed like something that was just too big for me. But then, with Alfred, they seemed like, well, maybe they were manageable. And ever since then I have been thinking about making babies with Alfred. I want to so badly, but now, all of a sudden, he's completely against the whole idea. Though his reasons arelogical, it doesn't make me feel any better about the situation. I guess I just have to suck it up, eh? But I hate it.
Well, I'm off to get dressed and finagle my way around town. What fun, what fun I tell you.