We ate dinner in the food court at the mall with her sister Ashley and a mutual friend of ours, Brian. I was sitting there, kinda zoning out and my eyes happened to stop and rest on this cute highschool aged couple. They were sitting across from each other at a table, holding hands... and the look in the girl's eyes as she stared at the boy was just... I dunno. So open and trusting and loving. It made me stop and think about relationships and just how much I used to feel when I was still in highschool. Everything at that age seems to be magnified by like 10.
The only feelings I know at all anymore are a light contentment and anger. I feel love towards Alfred, yes... but no where near the ferocity of which I would feel it if i were, say, 16.
Is that what growing up leads to? The dulling out of emotion? It's like remnants of those feelings still exist... but they're no where near as deep or dramatic.
Or is this just me?
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I found an 8 ball keyring for Alfred to replace the one he had that broke. Paid fucking $5 for it...so this one had better not ever break.
All in all, I spent about $60 today.
Bah.
I should be saving money.. being all grown up and looking towards the future...but its so fucking hard, ya know?
I hate growing up. I kinda miss being a teen in highschool.
I mean, I love the freedom I have now... not having to go to highschool, being able to do what I want, when I want to ((well, for the most part)) But I miss not having to worry about the bills being paid and the upkeep of the house. Gah.
Well, i'm out to go do something else now.. blah