Yeah. I write that me and Alfred are doing well and then shit like today happens. Its like he gets in these moods and there is nothing that can be done to avoid an arguement.
He seemed in an odd mood earlier this morning when I first talked to him. He got rained out of work and is sitting at home doing basically nothing all day. So, yeah, of course that puts him in a bad mood. I can understand that. So we have been talking off and on all day and just now I told him I figured I would just call him later because we were sitting there on the phone not talking or anything. He tells me I'm hating him and I tell him i'm not, that I'm just bored. He tells me "oh, I'm sorry I'm boring you." and I tell him its not that hes boring me its just that we're not saying anything. He tells me he doesn't understand me... I bitch about not being able to talk to him and now that I have the chance I I wanna get off the phone. I try to tell him its not that, it's just we're not talking at all. That i've tried to start up conversation but hes just yeah-yeahing me about everything. Then he tells me that he can't uphold conversation all by himself... and I try to tell him that I'm not expecting him to... and he starts to say something about me getting all mad at him so I interrupt and say I'm not mad... Then he tells me, oh yeah, I'm not trying to say anything or anything and then he hung up on me.
It's just a bunch of crap.
I called him back and got his voicemail and told him he shouldn't be mad and that I'm not mad, I'm just bored and we weren't talking and that I love him and miss him... but it just seemed silly to me to be sitting there on the phone with nothing to talk about.
It's just crap. I could tell just by how he was acting on the phone all day today that shit was going to hit the fan and we would be fighting before the day was out. I hate this bullshit. I just want shit to be nice. I want him to talk to me, tell me about stuff... not just, "uh-huh, yeah, ok, whatever." While he's gone he's so fucking distant and it all just sucks.
Gah.
I hate this. Its so fucking childish.